You can try a long-distance relationship for a short time. First, you need to consider your relationship and your long-term goals. If you are married you may answer differently than if you have only been in the relationship for a short time.
But if you are in a long-term, committed relationship, you may answer the questions the same way you would if you were married. If you are willing to quit your current job and move, is your partner willing to support you while you look for work? Keep in mind that it can take quite a bit of time in today's job market to find a good job. And if you are in a serious relationship but aren't married, is marriage something both of you are considering? These are all important points to consider before making a move.
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Next, you need to determine if one career is more important than the other. Some couples plan on having one spouse stay home with any children they may have. While this can be a tough decision to make, many couples choose this based on the income of each spouse.
But if you are the spouse that will support the family and you are the higher earner, then it does not make sense for you to give up your job to move. It's also important to consider the area where you are moving.
Most bigger cities' job markets are easier to break into, and there are usually more open jobs, as opposed to a smaller city or town. These are the kinds of things to think about as you prepare to move in together. Why are you moving in together?
And more specifically, why now? If your answer has something to do with feeling pressured or wanting to save on rent, you may want to rethink your decision. A wise choice of partner will add to your abilities. When you live by yourself, you can invite your buddies over to watch a playoff game whenever you please. Once you and your significant other become roomies, however, you have to factor them into these decisions.
While having this honest discussion, Malonson suggests asking what your partner is OK with when it comes to get-togethers and guests at your home.
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How do they feel about family members dropping by unannounced? Do they need a certain amount of alone time during the weeknights? Money is an awkward topic, no doubt. Will you switch off doing the weekly shopping, or will you shop together and one person will Venmo the other? Will one person take care of grocery expenses while the other covers another cost of living together? For example, you might land on a middle ground if both you and your significant other wish to be close to your jobs, which are 30 miles apart from one another.
Learn early on which locations may work well for both of your needs, as well as which locations you both agree you can comfortably afford. There are always pros and cons to moving in with someone. On the upside, you may find it extremely convenient to have your significant other around all the time and they may be tidy and respectful roommates to top it off! On the downside, they may snore like a bear and leave toothpaste all over the sink every morning.
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No couple wants to talk about a future that might not include one another in it. That being said, having a plan for a possible break up is always a good idea. If you prefer not to look at this as a breakup plan, consider it a way to learn about what your partner values in terms of their belongings so that you can go into the move with a certain level of care and respect for those items. Remember that cohabitating couples do not have legal protection, but your cohabitation agreement see 3 can outline the equitable distribution of assets in the event of a break up.
Consider which items you might want to have shared ownership over. Lastly, consider how a breakup could affect any pets you have. Will there be shared custody? How often will you each visit or have the pets?
Questions to help you avoid them:
Who takes out the trash? Who cleans the toilets? Who mops the floors? These questions usually work themselves out over time, but not without some heated discussions along the way! Make the process easier on both of you by discussing chores you each like to handle.